George went to the school and saw his friend, Norbert.
“Hello Norbert.” George said.
“Hi.” Norbert replied, “Did you bring a dog shit as they told?”
“Well, our IT teacher said lately, that we were supposed to bring a dog shit for today’s classes.”
“Lol??! I don’t remember her saying that!”
“Shouldn’t have slept during classes then.”
“What am I gonna do now?”
“I will lend you a plastic box and you will crap inside it. Then you can say it’s a dog shit.”
“Nah man, she’s gonna find out. Dog shits are small.”
“Hmm… I know, shit into the box, cut a small piece of the shit and form it to have a shape of dog shit.”
“Alright, sounds like a plan.”
And then George pulled down his pants and shoot a shit from his ass straight into the box.
“You retard, who told you to do this in the middle of the hall?” Norbert flinched.
“Lol, I haven’t thought about it.”
“Well it’s not the first time you haven’t thought.”
Norbert went upstairs, while George cut a small piece of shit and threw the rest on the floor. Then he caught up with Norbert. A moment later, their group entered the classroom.
“Alright my dears, take out your dog shits.” The teacher said, “Okay, now smear it into the keyboards of your computers.”
“Aaand what if someone brought their laptop and they don’t want to cover it all in crap?” asked Peter.
“Then they have a problem.” The teacher replied.
“And why are we even doing this in the first place?” asked Jason.
“To increase the computer’s performance.” The teacher replied, “And later you can lick off the shit from the keyboards and you won’t have to eat dinner today.”
“Yuck!” Jason flinched, “That’s disgusting!”
“If you have a problem Mr. Jason, I suggest you to get the fuck out of here, before I fill you with lead.”
Then George asked Norbert:
“Hey, what if only a dog’s shit increases performance, and human shit doesn’t?”
“Are you kidding?” Norbert asked, “It’s not possible to increase a computer’s performance by smearing ANY shit into a keyboard. We’re only doing this to get good grades. You can see obviously that the teacher is out of her mind.”
George calmed down a bit and smeared his crap into the keyboard. Then, the computer exploded and damaged everyone in the classroom.
“Dafuq happened?!” the teacher shouted, “George! Did you use human shit?!”
“Umm, yeah, but this would’ve happened with dog shit as well! It’s a short circuit!”
“ARE you STUPID?!” the teacher got up from the floor and wiped the dust off of herself, “Human shit leads to short circuit only! Look!”
The teacher started to do some operations on a computer with its keyboard all covered in dog crap.
“Can you see the lighting speed?! It’s thanks to the dog shit!” said the teacher. Her computer was indeed lighting fast thanks to the shit.
“Your stupid human shit has led to an explosion of a computer! You’re gonna pay for that, you piece of shit!”
And then George took out a giant hot-dog from his pocket and swoop everything around him off the surface of planet Earth.